M is still poisoned. It’s a good thing tomorrow’s chemo was canceled, he hasn’t rebounded from the last one.
This time it isn’t just tears in his eyes, he occasionally lets out involuntary whimpers from the joint pain and the shooting leg pains. Let’s see what else… The nausea comes and goes, his vision isn’t back from when it deteriorated, he’s always so cold, and he’s itchy. His feet are swollen in addition to being numb and he’s lost a lot of his fine motor skills. And, he’s also having issues with confusion and memory. He’s sleeping a lot, which I thoroughly encourage as sleep is important for healing!
We went out for breakfast yesterday though! It was good that he got out of the house a little bit!
I can’t reiterate enough how important an anti-depressant and a therapist that I see every two or three weeks has been. At the beginning of this I couldn’t listen to my music playlist without crying, practically every other song, now I can. This is how I measure success.
I’ve also learned that when people ask you how things are going, they really just want to hear “good” or “fine”.